Personal

2 March 2025 by Marcia Francois Leave a Comment

#7 Let’s do this – February wrap-up

I briefly considered pushing through and writing this on Friday so that it could actually still be February but decided to give myself grace instead and use my usual time on a Sunday.

February indeed lived up to its short month status – blink and it was over. However, here in Johannesburg, we had a deliciously COLD week, so cold I needed boots and jackets and scarves! All utterly lovely.

I am already, as I sit here in jeans and flip-flops, longing for real winter. But never fear, it is now officially the most beautiful season, autumn! I cannot wait for the leaves to turn and I will be smiling from ear to ear the minute there is that lovely refreshing crispness to our mornings again.

I’m going to be crossing off another goal this week when I complete my first client trip of the year to Cape Town. I try to be efficient and cram everything into 3 days which means I’ll see 6 – 7 clients, 2 direct reports, 4 friends and will fly back home, completely knackered but with my connection cup full.

Read the rest of the post here:

Filed Under: Goals, Personal, Planning Tagged With: monthly review

8 January 2025 by Marcia Francois 1 Comment

{goals} Reflect on my 2024 word of the year – whole

I just read my 2023/ 2024 post which details why I chose the word tend for 2023 and whole for 2024.

Read it here.

I chose the word whole because I felt broken after 2023’s craziness. Work pressures, leadership pressures, parenting pressures and loneliness.

And then I felt like things started off well in 2024, certainly in areas other than my body but to such an extent that I considered changing my word at the end of June. I thought I’d get some thinking done on holiday to decide if I wanted a new word.

Then I came back from holidays and went straight into the suspicious mammogram and all that happened afterwards.

Of course, then, from 12 July I was plunged into the vortex of medical appointment after medical appointment, treatments and so on.

I then realised that perhaps the word whole meant my body was being restored physically. I have also never cried as much as I did last year; I said to a work friend yesterday that I am now that person who cries everywhere and in front of everyone (in waiting rooms, at the oncology rooms, at the surgeon’s office, at the hospital, in front of people, etc.) – everywhere. Maybe that was also part of becoming whole emotionally? Or am I stretching here?

I still feel somewhat broken in certain parts of my life – is this just how it goes as one ages? is life really this hard? I don’t know. That much is clear – I have no idea and cannot control a single thing.

In summary, 2024 was not the most fun I ever had in my life (or with a word) but it will be my reminder that I had to focus on my physical body in 2024. Ironically, because of all this “single area” focus, I still have a lot of things on my medical to-do list to sort out, only one of which I have attended to (my new glasses).

How did your 2024 word work out for you?

Did it guide you with decisions? Did it focus your thoughts and feelings?

Filed Under: Goals, Intentional living, Personal, Word of the year Tagged With: annual review, goals, word of the year

23 December 2024 by Marcia Francois 1 Comment

{goals} 2024 reflection – what went well?

Friends, I have 10 questions I’m using this year to do my reflection exercise.

I’ve already done a work reflection (on my last work day of 2024 – Friday) and it was good to work through 5 pages of questions and prompts as I considered what worked and what didn’t this year.

I won’t get to work through all 10 of the questions here on the blog but I most certainly will do so in my bullet journal. What I do want to do is work through 4 questions – reflect on my 24 in 2024 list (done), what worked, what energised and delighted me, and reflect on my 2024 word of the year (whole). That will take us into the first week of 2025.

So for today, what worked this year, or what went well?

Having my 24 in 2024 list. Here is the update post.
I bought a car that I love. I paid for it in cash (thank you, past self, for saving) and every day when I had to travel to all my medical appointments, I was SO GLAD that my car was reliable and had amazing aircon.

Exercise – I exercised three times a week most weeks of this year. I obviously could not exercise for 6 weeks while recovering from surgery but I had a good year of exercise. Twice a week Zumba and weekly Spanish. Of note, I tried a stretch class and a pilates class and…. they are not for me.
Listening and obeying God with regards to the mammogram. I wrote end of last year/ beginning of this year while in Clarens that I wanted to get better at listening and obeying. It’s not always a very conscious thing, but it is heeding the still, small voice. I still dread to think what would have happened if I hadn’t gone for my mammogram then. On a practical note, I’d still be in treatment now instead of enjoying the festive season but the treatment could have been worse (chemo and radiation, a more radical surgery, etc.).
We took a family holiday in Ballito. For the first time, my sister’s family and my father joined for some of those days and it was so lovely. My sister and I said afterwards that we are so glad we took that time away before everything changed.
I also got to go home (!) to PE for my father’s 70th birthday a week before radiation started. Great timing and also good to see both parents as I’m told that it’s been hard on them.

I read more than 125 books. I will edit this post and put in the final number once the year is up. 125 is at yesterday when I finished Christmas at O’Mara’s. It has been a great reading year without slumps and, as usual, the key is to keep many options available, and read in every format available. It also helped that the City of Johannesburg bought many good (current) Libby books this year. When your holds come in, you get on with it and read.
I wrote 24 minutes every weekend in 2024 for #write24in2024. For about 3 weekends, the writing was by hand in my line-a-day journal or in my bullet journal, but most of that time, it was writing on this blog or my newsletter. I am very, very proud of this achievement because it’s not easy to sustain a discipline for 52 Sundays! Result – my newsletter subscribers received more than 12 monthly newsletters. Yay!
Some aspects of work went very well. I can’t give any particulars, of course, but I am happy with almost everything from this year. I can share this – I felt really supported by having good work friends this year.
I put on a list to have 24 fun nights. What counts? Actual different things done and nights away. At the end of December, we’ll have had 14 nights away in total, and I had an additional 6 fun nights out with friends. 20 out of 24 is great post-pandemic since I only go to gym these days and do nothing else that is fun.
I wrote about my 50 gifts project which ended up at 55 gifts. It was so, so, so fun and I have carried on looking for places to give instead of receive from this year’s birthday in August too. This year I’m not aiming for a number but I am listing them. My favourite gift in this 50 – 51 year is that I chose to give a monthly donation to Thula Baby Project in Cape Town. I forgot that I’d donated last year and they wrote to ask for a once-off, so I said I’ll do better than that – let me give an amount monthly. Easy to set up and they can now count on my giving to help support mothers and babies in CT.

What worked for you this year? What went well?

Filed Under: Goals, Mindset, Personal

16 December 2024 by Marcia Francois 3 Comments

{goals} 2024 reflection – how did the 24 in 2024 goals list go?

It is now the part of the year I love – reflection time! I may decide to post twice a week to get through, or I may decide to write the very abbreviated version of the annual reflection here, and properly do it in my workbooks; we’ll see!

I don’t think I ever posted the full list of 24 in 2024 goals. I actually have two lists and this I did tell you about.

quarterly goals update after Q1

six months in

And now here we are, with the year practically over.

24 in 2024

The statistics

I set 24 goals on the main list, abandoned one item and finished 21 out of the 23 which is 91% done.
On list 2, I set 23 goals and finished 16, which is 70%.
Not mentioned but done with 100% compliance to medical professionals – breast cancer, surgery and treatments – so I think I did great this year on the things that mattered.
My relationships are worse in some areas but I have to keep reminding myself that it takes two people to keep things alive. Not everything in the world is my responsibility.

What worked?

Having once-off items sprinkled into the list amidst project-based goals
Having an open mindset so that upholder tightening didn’t set in
Getting big things done early
Building review time into every month’s rhythms
Abandoning some things that were just not going to happen

my favourite jacaranda tree in Jhb

How do I feel?

After the breast cancer diagnosis, I considered abandoning everything but I found I needed a few things to work on and look forward to, like reading, exercise and writing. This turned out to be a great plan because many times, it felt like I was deep in the weeds and it helped me to have other things to focus on.
I will again make a 25 in 2025 list but there are a few things that are on there every year that I need to now admit are never going to happen, like weekends away with friends. I have a way higher likelihood of just doing my own thing. I think I have finally admitted that to myself.
I will, however, continue to set goals on the things that bring me joy, like creating, connecting and moving my body.

How did your 24 in 2024 list go?

Have you thought about what your 2025 list will look like?

Filed Under: Goals, Mindset, Personal, Planning Tagged With: 24 in 2024, goals, intentional living

11 November 2024 by Marcia Francois 1 Comment

Five Senses portrait of radiation therapy

On Wednesday when I was laying on the radiation table/ bed, I thought that I should write a Five Senses portrait so that I remember this month when it’s all over.

Here’s the background.

breast cancer awareness month

Sight

The tree-lined jacaranda street as I drive to the oncology radiation unit.
The friendly smile of the security guards.
Sweat on the workers as they do their work in the heat outside.
The smiling photo wall of all employees in the radiation unit.
The big tree with all the buttons of those who have completed their treatment cycles and the big brass bell which I cannot wait to ring!
The colour of that day’s scrubs. I commented once and there is indeed a colour of the day. However, all students doing their practicals wear grey.
The sight of the basket (I’m number 16) with the sheet for the bed, the box with the reflective markers and my treatment card.
The always friendly faces of the radiation therapists.
The red lines of the infrared tracking cameras on the ceiling as the machine moves into position.
The screen above the bed and the yellow bar of my breaths that have to move onto the blue bar so that my heart is in the correct place for the treatment to my breast. (Deep Inspiration Breath-Hold)

Smell

The smell of cement as I walk to and from my car to the building.
My stale smell as I am not allowed to wear deodorant in the left armpit. I welcome cooler days and there have been about 5 so far (I am halfway through at the time of writing).

Hearing

Building sounds outside the unit
Crunch of my car’s wheels as I drive into the parking lot
The stamp of the rubber stamp as the receptionist validates my parking ticket.
“We’re ready for you, Mrs Francois”
“Take a few breaths. Now take some deep breaths in and out. When you’re ready, take a deep breath and HOLD. Perfect!”
The sound of the treatment bed shifting into position.
The sound of the treatment beams
The gantry moving the
“Alright, we’re all done for today. You can relax your arms now.”
“How many sessions left?” (this is because I started out saying, “one down, twenty to go”)

Taste

The delicious taste of ice-cold water from the dispenser after most of my treatments (I don’t drink anything before in case I need the loo while on the bed).
Some days I also bite into a sweet and tart Granny Smith apple as I walk out and to my car.

I used to have a shift dress in this exact colour a million years ago that paired with a jacket; I loved that outfit!

Touch

The feel of the cornstarch I dab in my armpits. I dab some fresh cornstarch just before treatment so I don’t smell.
The cotton of the pale-blue gown against my skin that I’m required to wear.
The feel of the radiotherapists’ hands taping the block with reflective markers to my chest, and moving both my torso and my arms into position. Andile is the therapist with the cold hands 😉
The welcome cool temperature of the treatment room; it’s hot outside because it’s summer in Johannesburg.
The feel of my cap on my head as I walk back out into the hot Johannesburg sun.
The feel of the parking ticket and either coins if I have it, or a note, to pay for my parking.
The welcome cold of my car’s aircon blasting as I drive home.

I hope this was interesting. I might come back and edit the post if I remember other sensations.

Do you have any questions?

PS here’s another Five Senses portrait of Saturday morning Zumba.

Filed Under: Personal Tagged With: five senses portrait

23 September 2024 by Marcia Francois Leave a Comment

I’m 50; 10 things I’ve learned about relationships

This is part 4 of the Things I’ve learned by 50 series.

Part 1 – time

Part 2 – organising

Part 3 – social media

Part 4 – goals

People first, then things. This applies for money, for time and for priorities. Some of our closest friendships happened because we always prioritise time with them even if it’s not the most convenient time. In the photo below, that was our anniversary but our friend was here in Jhb, unexpectedly for family stuff and we were thrilled that we got to spend time together.
Always be kind. It feels like a trite thing to say but I see a lot of unkindness and it’s unnecessary 99% of the time. So much can be overcome by just being kind. I am personally undone by kindness and always will remember people fondly who showed me kindness.
As far as possible, leave every interaction better than before you arrived.
Smile. Most things in life can be improved by interacting with a person who smiles.
Say hello and exchange a few words with cashiers, tellers, receptionists, people in the queue with you. These micro interactions are what life’s all about and might be the only time someone gets to talk to a fellow human being.

1. Assume positive intent (I know I wrote this in the social media post too; yes, it is that important) and give people the benefit of the doubt.
2. You don’t always have to be the one to stoke the fire of your relationships or be the only one reaching out; do your part anyway.
3. Learn the 5 love languages, enneagram numbers and Tendencies of those closest to you, both family, friends and close work colleagues. This will help you to see things from others’ points of view and help you to improve your interactions.
4. Choose true connection over superficiality. E.g. a 1:1 coffee date is always going to feed your soul more than light chit-chat with a group of friends.
5. Forgive small grievances and be the low-maintenance friend.

Bonus – Sometimes friendships will break down or your friends will ghost you and you will not know why or if you did anything to cause it. This has happened to me before and another friend had to tell me, “sometimes you won’t ever find out the why”.

Tell me your relationship learnings, tips and tricks. What else can you add to my list?

Filed Under: Intentional living, Personal

2 September 2024 by Marcia Francois Leave a Comment

I’m 50; 10 things I’ve learned about goals

This is part 4 of the Things I’ve learned by 50 series.

Part 1 – time

Part 2 – organising

Part 3 – social media

And now, for my favourite – the one about goals. I realised that I could write 50 things on goals and 50 things on time but let’s focus in on just 10.

The principles always work if you work the principles. This sounds hella boring but it’s so true. Even when things are going down the tube (cancer diagnosis, etc.), I’ve realised that the principles still work.
Write down your goals. This provides clarity, a sense of purpose and a reminder on what your goals actually are.
Look at your goals regularly – daily (if you like – this is too frequent for me), weekly, monthly, quarterly, half-yearly – and monitor your progress. At this point, you’re also allowed to evaluate if that goal is still serving you.
Once-off quick goals also serve their purpose for building momentum. E.g. organise your bedside table drawer. Suddenly you feel like you can tackle the whole bedroom’s 10 spaces.
Know your why. If you don’t align your goals with your own values, you won’t want to work at them.

It’s also good to have some projects to make progress on your regular habits (e.g. exercise twice a week, write every week, read a book every week)
Focus on the journey, not on the outcome. James Clear talks very nicely about this piece in Atomic Habits; the gist is this: if you control the things you can do (building the regular writing habit), then you will have a book at the end of x years or y months. Saying I want to write a book is lovely but more unattainable than saying, I will write for an hour, five days a week.
You will have obstacles. There is nothing wrong with you if you encounter stumbling blocks; this is all part of setting and achieving goals. Figure out how to go around/ over them.
Figure out how to make your goals work for you by using your personality or your Tendency. E.g. An upholder likes a schedule. Something on the schedule will almost always get done (my Saturday morning gym routine that I never miss unless sick or out of the city) An obliger likes accountability – if the obliger meets a friend at the exercise class twice a week, she will probably always pitch up.
Stop to celebrate your successes, even if small. This is where the monthly review is so valuable. It will provide motivation to keep on going.

Tell me your learnings about goals. What has worked for you; what doesn’t work for you that might work for others? Do you know your Tendency and how that has played into your goal-setting?

Filed Under: Goals, Personal Tagged With: goals, Things I learned by 50

26 August 2024 by Marcia Francois Leave a Comment

I’m 50; 10 things I’ve learned about social media

This is part 3 of my Things I learned by 50 series.

Part 1 – time

Part 2 – organising

Pongwe, Zanzibar

Don’t go on social media on “special” days like Christmas, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, etc. Trust me.
Be generous with liking your friends’ posts; it doesn’t cost you a thing to like someone’s post but it does mean that they see that you’ve seen their posts.
In the same vein, do leave comments, not only on friends’ posts but on anyone’s posts. I try to be generous and giving with comments if I have time and I know that it certainly brightens up authors’ days (they have sent me DMs to indicate same).
Contribute first and then consume. You will feel better by contributing to the conversation or beauty of a platform before simply scrolling.
Give yourself a daily (healthy) limit. I have a limit which I often break but at least I know that I’m then intentionally breaking my limit. This is easy to set up if you have an iphone.
If you’re zoning out on a particular platform, ask yourself, “what am I avoiding?” It could be an easy answer like “doing the laundry” but it could also be enlightening like “I’m avoiding having a difficult conversaion” or “I’m procrastinating on x piece of work because of y”.

Post about things that delight you, not what looks good on your grid (unless this is truly sparking joy for you). I’d started to feel at the end of last year that I should only post certain types of content and I made a goal to post delightful things to me this year. My version of delight is probably different to yours, and that’s okay. Sometimes you might need to take a complete break for awhile if the whole thing feels draining and no longer brings you joy.
Remember that you can’t see or hear tone or body language on social media; hold everything loosely and don’t read into things that may not be there.
Some people are really just living their lives; they are not posting AT you, they are just posting. This can feel hard when, for example, you see groups of friends having fun and you feel disconnected and lonely, or if you see people on beautiful holidays to Europe when you can’t even take a driving holiday two hours away. See 7 above – perhaps take a break for a week and see how you feel when you come back.
Always assume positive intent. Look, there are people whose sole mission in life is to stir but this is not most people. Block or mute those people if you’re not ableto handle it. Then you can assume positive intent for the rest.
Bonus – Does this content spark joy? You control your algorithm. If you don’t want to see gossip and strife, stop reading those posts and engaging with them (liking/ commenting/ sharing). My one account (organisingqueen) is very carefully curated to only be about organising, time management, goals, homes and reasonable tips. If I see other things creeping in, I become hyper aware and unfollow/ mark as “irrelevant”, etc. My marcia0608 account is a mishmash of friends, travel, gorgeous photography and should be pure delight. I mute or unfollow accounts if the content feels like it’s not meeting what I want that account to be.

Which learnings can you add regarding social media? I would love to know!

All three of these photos were taken within seconds of one another with slightly different perspectives

Filed Under: Personal, Social Media Tagged With: intentional living, mindset, social media, Things I learned by 50, time management

19 August 2024 by Marcia Francois Leave a Comment

I’m 50; 10 things I’ve learned about organising

Continuing my series (but if I can’t get to 50, I’m giving myself permission to stop) on things I learned by 50.

Here’s the first edition… on time management (even as I wrote that first blog, I thought of so much more I could write, so maybe we’ll circle back to time again).

For today though, here are 10 of my favourite things about organising.

1. 1. Just start. I also feel daily like I couldn’t possibly do one more thing and then I fold a sweatshirt and before you know it, my bedroom is tidy and it took 10 minutes. Pick a teensy weensy thing (decide this thing for every room in your house so that you don’t waste time thinking).
  2. “You can do anything for 15 minutes” – Flylady. It’s excellent advice for life (I tell myself this for all medical appointments) but works well for both organising and time. If you just use 1 and 2, you’re sorted for 90% of your home jobs.
  3. “Don’t put it down; put it away” – Suzanne Moore. Yes, my friend, Suzy, had lots of wisdom and I still remember her words when I walk to the kitchen and am tempted to just dump things anywhere. Two seconds longer and the thing is put away vs addint to clutter.
  4. Ask yourself, “who can use this today?” This is my favourite hack for decluttering. Most people dilly dally about decluttering BUT when they focus on thinking about people who need that jersey/ pair of shoes/ set of mugs, it’s much easier to let go. Bonus – set up weekly or monthly systems to get the things from your house to the animal shelter/ orphanage/ homeless people on the corner.
  5. It doesn’t have to be perfect to be organised. When I first blogged about that concept many years ago, it was true. It’s still true these days despite all the organising accounts on Instagram encouraging you to buy perspex containers to organise all your things. The inside of my cupboards STILL have mismatched containers. Remember the rule: if you can find what you need in a minute or two, your space is organised.

1. 1. One in, one out. Better still – one in, more out. I was in a home store a few weeks ago and fell in love with some beautiful side plates BUT I realised that I love my existing ones too and I’m not ready to let them go. This is a lovely “rule” for keeping your stuff contained to their spaces.
  2. A place for everything and everything in its place. It’s the reason it’s the number one organising tip. If you don’t have a place for everything, go around your house and decree the space’s purposes. Then you and everyone you live with knows to return things to that space.
  3. Before you buy anything, ask, “where will it go?” I go around the homeware stores and think about where that blanket/ pillow is going to go (and if I need to let go of the existing one – see 6 above). This will stop you buying lots of stuff you don’t need.
  4. Surfaces are for working and not for storage – Gretchen Rubin. I never quite thought of it like this but it’s true. I’m trying to instill this in my daughter whose desk is always full of junk so there’s only a tiny bit of space to open her school books. If the desk is clear, it’s so easy to set down your homework and get to it without first having to clear all the mugs, glasses and who knows what else.
  5. Outer order, inner calm. If your brain feels like it can’t focus on what to do first, tidy your surroundings. Even tonight as I sat down to write this post, I quickly tidied my desk so that my mind is clear to focus. Same in the kitchen – make sure your counters are clear so you can be creative with cooking or at least get it done fast 🙂

Which one of these tips most resonated with you?

Do share your own favourite organising tip (I’m definitely going to have to do a part 2)

Filed Under: Organising, Personal Tagged With: organising, organising spaces

12 August 2024 by Marcia Francois Leave a Comment

I’m 50; 10 things I’ve learned about time

Last week I celebrated the milestone of turning 50.

I don’t take this lightly because two close friends died before their time during the Covid days.

I started making one of those lists I LOVE to read and then I decided to see if I had enough to post several lists of 10. I think I do because I’ve written one list on time and one on organising, so let’s see if I can stretch it to another few lists after I post about those two categories.

These are the 10 things I learned about prioritising, saving and using your time more effectively during my 50 years:

Ask every day/ hour/ week/ month… what is the best use of my time right now? This has the surprising ability to clarify your priorities and I ask this question at least once a day, and while I’m working, several times.
If it’s going to take two minutes or less time to do something, just do it.
Saying no is a big part of saying yes. If you struggle to say no, consider which parts you can’t say yes to because you’re saying no to the wrong things… right now.
Work expands to fill the time available for it. If you want to clean your bedroom for two hours, you can do that. But if you only want to spend 20 minutes, you will get the most important things done during that time too.
There’s always enough time if it’s important to you. I wrote a book about this called 31 days of enough time. If you find it important to exercise, you will make the time. If you want to connect with friends, you will figure out the how.

Plan your week and plan your day before it even starts. This ensures that you hit the ground running, even if only in your mind. A plan doesn’t have to be a 10-item list; it can be 3 things too.
Get enough sleep and your productivity will increase. This is the first thing I work on with all coaching clients – sleep. If you think it doesn’t matter, try getting a 7 – 8 hour block of time for about 4 – 5 days at a stretch and see how energetic you feel and how productive you are. Book your coaching session!
Eat your frogs first but don’t put more than 3 – 5 frogs on your list every day. I like only 3 during a work day (and these days, one of them is to show up fully present, prepared and engaged!) and 3 – 5 on weekends.
Before you add a commitment to your schedule, ask yourself if it sparks joy. Sometimes attending a meeting at school in itself does not spark joy but the outcome – knowing what’s going on and being connected with your child – does.
Done is better than perfect. That first done level is at about 80%. Did you know that it will take as much time to do that last 20% as the first 80%? If you have the time and you’ve finished the first 80% quicker than you planned, by all means, do a bit extra, but it’s helpful to understand the metrics upfront.

Which are your favourite time tips?

Did one of these tips particularly resonate with you?

(I live to hear from you like old-school blogging so make my day and comment)

Filed Under: Personal, Time management Tagged With: coach with marcia, enough time, time management

#7 Let’s do this – February wrap-up

Read the rest of the post here: