{goals} Reflect on my 2024 word of the year – whole

I just read my 2023/ 2024 post which details why I chose the wordΒ tend for 2023 andΒ whole for 2024.

Read it here.

I chose the word whole because I felt broken after 2023’s craziness. Work pressures, leadership pressures, parenting pressures and loneliness.

And then I felt like things started off well in 2024, certainly in areas other than my body but to such an extent that I considered changing my word at the end of June. I thought I’d get some thinking done on holiday to decide if I wanted a new word.

Then I came back from holidays and went straight into the suspicious mammogram and all that happened afterwards.

Of course, then, from 12 July I was plunged into the vortex of medical appointment after medical appointment, treatments and so on.

I then realised that perhaps the word whole meant my body was being restored physically. I have also never cried as much as I did last year; I said to a work friend yesterday that I am now that person who cries everywhere and in front of everyone (in waiting rooms, at the oncology rooms, at the surgeon’s office, at the hospital, in front of people, etc.) – everywhere. Maybe that was also part of becoming whole emotionally? Or am I stretching here?

I still feel somewhat broken in certain parts of my life – is this just how it goes as one ages? is life really this hard? I don’t know. That much is clear – I have no ideaΒ  and cannot control a single thing.

In summary, 2024 was not the most fun I ever had in my life (or with a word) but it will be my reminder that I had to focus on my physical body in 2024. Ironically, because of all this “single area” focus, I still have a lot of things on my medical to-do list to sort out, only one of which I have attended to (my new glasses).

How did your 2024 word work out for you?

Did it guide you with decisions? Did it focus your thoughts and feelings?

How I did on my 2022 goals

As I do every year, I set some goals for 2022. I used Gretchen’s printable, My 22 for 22 List.

Some items were once-off (apply for high schools), some were project-based (read 100 books) and some were continual (Project Life monthly).

I really like having a mix of different types of goals so that they all don’t feel insurmountable at the same time.

So how did I do?

I got 13 done completely, 3 not done at all, and 7 partially done. With about a month since I last looked at the list, I think I was maybe too hard on myself with those 7 partially done because if I were coaching someone else, I’d consider some of them done because one of those partially done goals was at 95%, one at 62% and one at 50%. Oh well – honesty!

Still, not bad in a year that was really not the best at all.

One of the items I’m particularly happy about is getting my will done! It took 5 months of thinking, drafting, redrafting, conversations (so many conversations!), and then we finally had a final copy for signature which was done in December. Yay!

I want to talk separately about my “success” with reading because I really feel like I’ve set up good rhythms and routines that I can rely comfortably on. With almost no effort, I can get through 8 books a month. I mention it here because the one consistent thing many people talk to me about is that they want to read more, and… I can definitely help you with that.

How did you do with your 2022 goals? Can you even remember what you put on your list?

PS Gretchen’s 23 for 2023 list is here

How I did on my Project Upgrade for 2022

Unlike #rest22in2022, Project Upgrade was a huge success.

I just read the first paragraph of my post where I told you about it and it is literally the opposite of what rest was for me… and maybe that’s why it worked so well.

If you’ve hung around here for awhile, you know I love a project. I don’t know what it is but I think it’s that I like something with clearly-defined rules, and a very clear start and end date.

Remember it all started with a hotel facecloth from a hotel… and morphed into a big list of 22 items. As is always the case with these kinds of lists, some things were not as important but other things had to be added onto the list that I couldn’t have anticipated.

Things that didn’t get done

  • we were just about ready to sort out the pool and then our city announced water restrictions so we couldn’t go ahead
  • I still don’t have the big pot I mentioned in that original post (I still want one and welcome your ideas)
  • I have started to simplify our luggage (kids are sorted) but mine could use an upgrade πŸ˜‰
  • I don’t need a standing desk anymore as we’re in the office so much but I did buy two laptop raisers – one for work and one for home

Good things done that were not on the original list

  • got 4 new tyres
  • got some plumbing sorted out (much, much bigger job that spanned two months)
  • we had to replace a section of our boundary wall
  • I replaced two phone screens
  • I bought a lovely, new laptop bag and handbag (and mouse pad) with some of my bonus
  • I bought new glasses (not covered by medical aid!)
  • I loved the upholstery so much I went wild and did two more chairs and an additional couch

All in all, I still did more than 22 things so this was a big, big success for me.

You’ll not be surprised that I’ve already made a smaller Project Upgrade list for 2023. One of the big items is getting solar panels installed which will solve so many problems in this land of loadshedding and power outages.

Feedback to follow at the end of the quarter πŸ™‚

Do you need to make a Project Upgrade list for 2023? Or maybe a few items on your 23 goals in 2023 should be matters of upgrade?

Rest 22 in 2022 – my update

Last year Gretchen Rubin‘s challenge for her podcast listeners was to #rest22in2022.

rest 22 in 2022

Here’s my introductory post and how I thought it would go… and then here’s where I was assessing things after the first quarter. When I read those two posts I realise that 1) I really tried to be intentional about it and 2) keep evaluating what was working and what wasn’t.

Still, it was my worst project to date πŸ˜‰ and I gave up on it properly during the first week of May. For the rest of the year, I used the tracker to track my workouts so that I didn’t waste the paper!

Why was it so hard for me? Surely, as an upholder, I should have just scheduled my rest and got on with it.

Well, one of my coaching clients pointed something out to me – the idea of rest was too nebulous for me. Exactly right! I couldn’t quite get a handle on what it looked like for me and, if you’ve come on the Four Tendencies course/ had a coaching session with me, you know that upholders need clarity.

I didn’t have clarity.

When I decided to finally abandon the project, I told myself that I am sleeping well, I read daily and I do enough “restful” activities like spending time taking photos, connecting with friends, etc. and that will just have to do for rest. But no more tracking.

And so I could release the idea of doing #rest22in2022.

Tell me, because I know many of you are experts at resting, how did the year of rest work for you?

{goals} It’s time to reflect on 2022 and reset for 2023

In November 2018 I tried a new thing. I wanted to create a habit of writing every day and I thought I’d kick off my end-of-year reflections as part of that writing project. It worked really, really well. In just 15 minutes a day, I did my entire reflection of the year.

The best part of it all was that it was well before my usual time for reflection, the week after Christmas. This meant that I was calm, peaceful and in the right frame of mind to enjoy my holidays and look forward to the new year.

I loved that so much I repeated it every year with similar success.

I’m doing the same thing this year with my 2022 reflection. I’m also offering a bunch of people the same process via 1:1 coaching sessions and I would love you to join me for one of those sessions.

During our time together, we’re going to reflect on the year that’s (nearly) passed, get real about our season of life, explore our values and core desired feelings, and then when we’re connected to our purpose, we’re going to set some very loose goals for the next 3 months. I’m also going to teach you exactly what to do when you face obstacles (like Covid did with all of us the last few years) and how to still set yourself up for success, whatever that looks like for you.

Here are the details:

  • $75/ R1000 for a 75-minute session
  • Decide if you prefer a weekday or weekend session and email me.
  • I’ll send you all available session times for a week or two, a Paypal invoice, Gmail invitation with a Teams link and the handbook.
  • You’ll send me your prep at least a day beforehand (so I can prepare) and we’ll meet to discuss and have an amazing session.

If you start your reflection early, you can relax and enjoy your Christmas/ New Year celebrations, knowing that you’re already set for 2023. This is the part I’m most looking forward to – the having it done and being able to relax and enjoy the festive season, no matter what that looks like.

My goal for this time together is that each person leaves our session with gratitude, clarity and hope for the year ahead.

Email me and I’ll book your place.

My word of the year recap for 2021 – play

My word of the year for 2021 was play and for the most part it was a good word in that it invited me to hold things loosely and to choose play over work sometimes.

Let me share what play looked like for me in 2021:

  • I redid a photography course from 2012, Superhero Photo, and loved it. I also brought my big camera with me on holidays and intentionally played with it a lot. I also found some old cameras which I also used – sometimes it’s freeing to only have to focus on composition and how pleasing framing is to the eye, and nothing else.
  • I went on intentional photo drives during autumn and winter, my favourite seasons.
  • I read 152 books, 43 of them audio, which is a particularly playful way of reading for me as I so enjoy a well-narrated book. The question, “what sounds like play?” became very important.
  • On that note, I did Gretchen’s #read21in2021 and cleared 32 books from my non-fiction bookshelf. I’m going to write some more on this because I learned so many useful things about my project style.
  • We went on four holidays – Drakensberg, Clarens (twice) and Ballito.
  • I brought back 1:1 dates with the kids.
  • I watched the most TV I’ve ever watched in my entire life – Nine Perfect Strangers, Kim’s Convenience, Marriage Contract, Lula Rich, Mare of Eastown, and Grace and Frankie for the second time, amongst others.
  • I went to Zumba at three different gyms, chasing the most fun classes.
  • I did Susannah Conway’s three photo challenges – April Love, August Break and December Reflections, and Laura Tremaine’s May photo challenge too.
  • I went to the ballet with two friends – one of the highlights of my year.

All in all, a good year of play.

I have chosen a new word for this year and I will tell you all about it next week πŸ˜‰

How was your 2021 word? Do you feel like you lived it out enough? How can I help you more?

(I am planning to write at least one more blog post, maybe two, on how to make your word real to you in a practical way).

My birthday month review

August is my birthday month and so I thought I’d share just some of my thoughts.

A reminder that I happen to use this review format around my birthday. You can do the same or if it doesn’t matter to you, then pic a random date and do an annual review, like now.

The end of the year is not a good time for me because kids are doing exams, then schools are closing, Christmas, holidays, etc. I do my annual review in November but I like the time around my birthday to do a more personal review.

Here’s the free printable birthday review PDF I made for us to use.

I didn’t want to use the same questions here, and I saw Jessica Honegger (founder of Noonday) talk about this method, so let’s try a start, stop, keep. list.

Start

  • Monthly one-on-one dates with the kids. These were going so well for 11 years and then… Covid. I need to bring these back again before it becomes even more difficult.
  • Dates with Dion. We left the kids alone for an hour and 10 minutes the other day and… nothing happened. It’s a start to the old life πŸ™‚

Stop

Working so hard and work smarter. I’ve already started putting a few new things into practice like being very good with daily focussed time

Keep

Reading – I’m reading at least 10 books a month on a consistent basis and have found a really good rhythm of audio, physical and ebooks that works well for me

Friends – I connect with one friend a week, on average, and I have one book club a month for fiction, and another book club every 6 – 8 weeks for non-fiction

Exercise – Zumba and Barre classes are going well. And due to Covid restrictions, if I miss out on a live class, I now know I have the option of an online workout. E.g. the other weekend the wind was howling outside (atypical Jhb weather) and we all slept through so I missed my Zumba class, but then I did an online workout.

Holidays – we tried one new place in this crazy year and it was a delight for my senses, especially during autumn, the most beautiful season πŸ™‚

Play – remembering my word of the year and saying yes to different things to keep it front of mind.

Some other birthday review posts:

My annual review in 2016

My annual birthday review in 2018

I made a birthday list in 2020

Do you do a birthday review?

What do you want to start, stop and keep in this next journey around the sun?

{goals} my word of the year for 2021 – play

At the risk of stating the extreme obvious, 2020 was not an easy year for many of us.

As I was contemplating a word for 2021, nothing came to mind. Literally nothing.

I got busy tidying, decluttering and sorting papers as I do at the end of every year, and I found a printable from a course I did – one of those word cloud things.

A word jumped out at me – PLAYFUL.

And immediately I knew my word of the year was PLAY.

I’m not a naturally playful person and I feel that this word will help me not only have fun again but also be more playful in spirit. I considered having fun as my word again but I like to choose new words every year, at least for now.

Why play?

  • I love that it’s a verb which means I need to take action to make it happen.
  • I want to do some fun projects – I’ve already identified Superhero Photo, a course I did 9 years ago. I found all the emails the other day and they brought me such joy that I can’t wait to play along again. I’m an upholder so I will happily and successfully complete a project like this all on my own. And bonus – I get to play with my big camera again.
  • I also noticed that when I participate in Instagram challenges purely focussed on creativity and the actual photos instead of what the grid is supposed to look like or not, and your engagement levels, etc. (none of which I pay attention to but that inner critic is always reminding me of the shoulds), I’m so happy. I take pleasure in posting a picture of the day. If it ties in remotely to what’s happening in my life, I might write a sentence or two otherwise, just posting is so freeing.
  • I want to design and write a new workshop on personalities which definitely feels like play to me.
  • I’d also like everything to feel more like play than work – so to infuse a sense of play into things. How can I make this more playful? more fun? E.g. reading never feels like work but I do sometimes think, “hmm, I need to read a few more non-fiction books” and this year, I want everything to feel more playful.

So how am I going to keep this top of mind?

I make a folder on my computer every year called Marcia’s favourites. A few weeks ago I spent a few hours while listening to a book scrolling through about 5 years of my favourite photos. Some are favourites because the landscape or scenery is breathtaking. But many are favourites because of everyday delights, like the way the light reflected off something, or a beautiful flower or item found in an unexpected place, etc.

I then copied the photos that felt playful to me into a new folder called play, and I’ve made a collage which I printed and put in front of me on the wall in front of my desk to remind me daily of my word.

In previous years, I have had jewellery made like a ring or a necklace. Some of these items have been passed on, like the TRUST necklace that I passed onto a friend going through a divorce. I might still do this because I love wearing a reminder and it prompts conversation which is always nice.

I also recommend making an image with your word and saving it as your lock screen on your phone so you see it hundreds of times every day.

What is your word for 2021? How will you remind yourself of your word to keep it top of mind?

Can you believe this is year 13 of choosing a word?! Here is a full list of all my words over the years:

  • 2009 – simplify
  • 2010 – consolidate
  • 2011 – courage
  • 2012 – create
  • 2013 – trust
  • 2014 – shine
  • 2015 – enough
  • 2016 – joy
  • 2017 – give
  • 2018 – fun
  • 2019 – bold
  • 2020 – light
  • 2021 – play

{goals} word of the year – 2020 recap of LIGHT

My word for 2020 was light. You can read more about my word here.

I think that my word was a great one for 2020; I looked for light through consciously choosing to use my big camera at least once a month (that was my goal) but managed to play with photos much more during most months.

Like the rest of the world, I really had to fight to see the light some days but I like to think I brought light through my posts on Instagram, this blog, my newsletter but most of all, through my workshops and coaching.

I ran two in-person workshops this year before the pandemic and six during lockdown on Zoom – 6 Four Tendencies workshops and 2 Love Languages workshops. I like to think that i helped those 66 people receive clarity and see some light in themselves and their relationships. Let me know if you want to come to the next Love Languages workshop in February.

I also coached 10 A M A Z I N G clients and every single coaching hour was a true delight πŸ™‚

I am just a little bit lighter physically and I definitely have been holding onto things much more lightly in terms of expectations from people. On the whole, I can’t say that I have lightened up though because this year felt heavy for me for the most part.

I was working through my Let’s Do This 2021 workbook (you can get your free one here) a few weeks ago. One of the questions is “in a word, 2020 was…” and immediately I wrote illuminating. I wrote it and then gasped as I had a realisation that it tied into my word so beautifully.

So much about people were illuminated to me through the pandemic, the Black Lives Matter movement, the US election, etc. and honestly, I don’t ever think I’ll be the same.

I’m going into 2021 a little battle-scarred, definitely have more grey hair and wrinkles, but I am hopeful and optimistic that this year will be better.

I’m still not sure of my word for 2021 but I’m also in no rush – that is what 2020 has taught me. You just can’t wish or force things to be.

How was your 2020? How did your word work out for you?

PS I have my word! I’ll post my word on Wednesday πŸ™‚

PPS Here’s a great post on Cup of Jo with hundreds of great words.

{goals} As the sun sets on 2020…

I hope you’ve made some time to think about 2020…

  • what went well
  • what didn’t go well
  • what you learned about yourself and others
  • what you’re proud of
  • what you’re grateful for

I’ve updated my annual Let’s Do This workbook and it’s ready and waiting for you to download for free here. Every year I consider not doing my reflection because I’m a “move forward and focus on the next goal” type of person, and every year when I finish, I again realise what a valuable exercise it is, and how it helps me to gain closure for the year.

I want that for you too.

Once you’ve done, it’ll be time to look forward to 2021. That’s also covered in the workbook, but I like to do it in two sessions – past and future.

We’ll talk more about 2021 next year, but for this week, download the Let’s Do This workbook and do the 2020 reflection exercises.

If you’re a new subscriber, there are more free printables available immediately when you sign up. Enjoy!

PS the picture is a winter sunset taken this year from my study at home one very ordinary day when I glanced up from my work

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