Let’s talk about values


I was reminded of something I love talking about recently – values.

Values are the things that shape our decisions and therefore, our actions.

When we feel conflicted or resentful about something, 90% of the time it’s because our values are in conflict or not showing up clear in the situation.

For example, maybe you’ve had a conversation with someone and you have this niggling feeling afterwards. If you stop and ask yourself, “what’s really going on here?” (a question I’ve started asking myself a lot), and you give yourself a few minutes, you’ll know what it is.

  • Maybe you didn’t stand up for someone who was being discussed, and one of your highest values is integrity?
  • Maybe you felt put upon and that resentment indicates your value of family is being pushed aside?Maybe you realised that actually no, you are not feeling connected and that’s what’s missing in your life?


I have a whole section on values in the Discover Yourself course (use code MARCIA til the end of August and you’ll get 30% off  the price) where I walk you properly through a values exercise.

However, if you want the quick version now, start like this:rite down 10 of your highest values

  1. narrow those down to your top 5
  2. now choose your top 3, and then your top 1.

bonus – ask your partner/ a friend to do the exercise too and compare notes.

What are some of your values? Are you living out these values in your life, work, with your family?



(the words underneath the 3 photos in this post represent 3 of my top 10 values)

PS It’s interesting to me (now!) that the mantra for the Upholder is “discipline is my freedom”. I would add, “self-imposed discipline is my freedom: 😉

PPS I do work with clients to take them through a comprehensive values exercise to aid them with decision-making and understanding why they behave in the way they do. If you’re interested, please send me an email.

Know yourself 1 – the trend with chalkboard

I was interviewed late last year for Your Baby magazine. They compare mothers with different parenting styles – unsurprisingly, I’m the mother who likes routines 🙂

Download and read the article here.


There’s been much ado all over the internet and especially, Pinterest, about chalkboard doors.

Actually, chalkboard doors, cupboard doors, chalkboard labels and gift tags, etc.

Like this.


In theory, I really like this idea. And I must admit, when they’re first done and they’re all neat and black, they do look gorgeous.

But practically, I keep thinking how I’ll have to rewrite the shopping list before going to the shop or rewrite the things to remember, which defeats the purpose.

What do you chalkboard people do? 

I know I’m certainly not brave enough to paint a wall with another colour, let alone chalkboard paint, but I thought I could get my little fix by buying a little chalkboard for the kitchen.

I saw one at my favourite South African home store (Mr P – they are not paying me to say that), hemmed and hawed, and I left it.

Because I have a personal rule – if it’s not a definite yes, it’s a no.

So then I saw a smaller, cuter, heart-shaped chalkboard at a fraction of the price, also at Mr P, and that one said, “take me home” so I did.

Only thing is… I forgot something really key.

I hate the sound of chalk on a chalkboard.

I wrote one thing on it (hello) and that was me. Done.

Dion then wrote “welcome” on the board at our babies’ 2nd birthday party (in July last year) and yes, that poor board is still sporting the welcome note. I think he added a due date for the library books below that in November and that is still how it looks.


 So there’s the thing – when I gave in to the heart-shaped chalkboard, I wasn’t thinking about my preference for no noisy squeaks on a board.

I’ve seen these chalkboard markers though… which look like a fabulous idea for people like me who like the look of the labels but not the sound or the mess!

Over to you.

Do you like the look of chalkboards?

Do you have a decorative chalkboard in your home?

Do you use real chalk or chalkboard markers? And if you’re in South Africa, where did you buy your chalkboard marker? I would like to try it on some of those cute labels…………….. 😉

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